Trust in your training, but more importantly, trust in yourself

9/17/2013

I forgot to bring my iPod on my run over the weekend, so it was just me and my thoughts for ten miles. I'm currently training for the Philadelphia Half Marathon, and I was thinking back to this time last year, when I completed my first 13 mile run EVER. Not only have I come a long way in the running world in terms of "stats" over the last year (completing two marathons as well as a handful of other running milestones), but I also feel like I've made leaps and bounds as far as how I feel about myself as a runner.

Trust in your training, but more importantly, trust in yourself

Let's back up to last November. I had trained all summer for my very first marathon - the Philadelphia Marathon. I wasn't an experienced runner or racer, having only started running more than 3 miles about a year prior, with only 3 races under my belt. In the weeks leading up to the race, my friends and family kept asking me - do you feel ready? My answers were varied, but in reality, I just wasn't sure. I was advised to "trust in my training", and I did just that. I didn't miss a training run, I learned how to properly fuel and hydrate, so I was going to have an awesome run, right?

While I don't know exactly what went wrong when race day came, I did learn that trusting in your training was not enough. During the marathon, I had a few things happen between miles 15 and 18 that I never had happen before and consequently, wasn't prepared. First, I had to pee! In all of my training runs, that had never happened, so somewhere between miles 15 and 16, I stopped to take care of that. There were a few seconds in that port-o-potty where I literally had to talk myself into getting back out there and running 11 more miles. I was never really good at stopping and starting during my long runs, so I started to get nervous. Somewhere around mile 18, I started to feel a pain in my Achilles. I had been very lucky during all of my training and never really experienced any injuries. I had no idea how to handle it, and with each step I was afraid that it would be the one where something snapped. This all came after I was supposed to meet up with my husband around mile 14 to switch out water bottles (and of course see some familiar faces), yet he wasn't there.

Somewhere between mile 18 and 19, I just started to walk. Of course, I promised myself it would just be to assess the pain, and as soon as I felt it was okay to run, I would start again. Which I did. For about half a mile. From that point on, I was half running and half walking to the finish line. At one point I was running along with a pacer group, and although my original goal time was no longer a possibility (yes, I know, first time marathoners aren't supposed to set goal times), I set a new one right there. I just had to keep up with this group for about 4 more miles. That didn't last long, and I soon fell behind the group.

No matter how disappointed I was during those last 8 miles, crossing the finish lines was still an amazing experience. I was able to ride that "high" through the rest of the day while celebrating with my friends and family. But when I got home that night, I was replaying those moments over and over in my head. I just couldn't figure out how an injury-free and seemingly perfect training went wrong. Over the next few weeks, I asked around and talked to runners who were more experienced, but in the end, I decided that as a runner, you'll have good days and bad days and my marathon was just a bad day.

Philly Marathon 2012

Feeling like I had some unfinished business, I signed up for the Pittsburgh Marathon the following May. I followed the same training plan (a mixture of Hal Higdon's Novice 1 & 2) and added speed training once/week. Although training in the winter months offered new challenges, once again, I had a great training. I lined up at the start line, this time with a little more confidence and experience, but in reality, I didn't feel any more "ready". I knew one thing - I wasn't going to stop! The Pittsburgh Marathon ended in success - I saw my friends at the exact places we planned, and the only time I stopped was in the last few miles to walk through an aid station and get something cold to drink (by this point in the day, it was starting to get warm and I was getting a little overheated). Confident I was going to finish without the struggle I experienced during my first marathon, I was able to start running again without even thinking about stopping. I even noticed that it actually hurt more to walk than it did to run.

Pittsburgh Marathon 2013

I finished my second marathon 10 minutes faster than my first. Mentally, I was in a much different place than I was back in November, and it felt amazing! Over the next few weeks, my friends and family asked me, "Which marathon are you running next?" The answer? I'm not sure. While I had definitely caught the running bug, I needed a break from all of that training. I had other goals to focus on (like being able to do a pull-up), and I knew that I just needed a break. One thing I learned during all that marathon training was that I REALLY LOVE the half marathon distance. It was a distance that was challenging, but didn't require as much prep or leave my body feeling broken when I was done. I decided to focus on some speed training, and I signed up for the Philadelphia Half Marathon, which is coming up THIS November. The best part about training for this is I'm not really following a training schedule. I still run about 4 times/week, but if I don't, I'm okay with it. I've been trying to focus on speed because I want to do more than finish this run - I want to race it, which brings me to the thoughts I had during my iPod-less run.

When I say I'm going to "race" this half marathon, I don't mean I'm going to try to win. Let's be honest, I'll be just beyond the halfway point when the winner crosses the finish line, but running is a sport you race against yourself, always trying to improve. I want to cross the finish line knowing I pushed myself as hard as I could. I want to set a goal and reach it not because it happened, but because I MADE it happen. I want to know that when I start to get tired, I'm going to push myself even more.

Without the pressure of a training schedule or a weekly mileage goal, I am able to dictate my training on as "as-needed" basis. I can go out and run a 5k because I just don't feel like going for a long run, without worrying about it ruining my training. I can decide to run a fast 10 miles because I haven't had a "great" run in a while. I have confidence as a runner, which I didn't have at this point last year.

I know that I can run 13.1 miles, which eliminates so much of the anxiety that goes along with a first time marathon training plan. Physically, my body can do what I want it to do - I've done it many times before. I've even done it pretty close to the goal pace I set for myself. So when I line up at the starting line in November and someone asks me if I'm ready, the answer will be, "ABSOLUTELY". Am I going to trust in my training? Sure. But more importantly, I'm going to trust in myself. I'll trust that I'm going to run at my own pace no matter how quickly or slowly the people around me are running. I'll trust that I won't start to slow down when I feel tired. I'll trust that I'm going to take in the atmosphere of the event and enjoy myself, because that's what this is all about.